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Why is it so hard to move on from divorce?

Moving on from divorce is an incredibly challenging process. Although your loved ones might try to help by telling you that it’s “time to move on” or that there is “plenty more fish in the sea”, this advice is a lot simpler to say than actually do. 

Going through a divorce is a form of grief, and you need time to process and come to terms with these emotions. I know first-hand how difficult it is to overcome grief, and if you are struggling to move on from divorce, there could be a range of reasons why:

  1. Not wanting to move on

This is a very common reason, particularly if you considered the relationship was happy. For friends, those keepsakes you are holding on to might seem meaningless, but to you, they are treasured memories that you cannot let go of. 

  1. You’ve tried moving on before

Rebound relationships are very common, but this is often a stop-gap to replace the loss we are feeling. When these relationships end, the baggage and wounds we are carrying from the divorce only grow, making it even harder to move on. 

  1. Scared to be hurt again 

Another reason for being unable to move on is a fear of being hurt again. By staying single, you believe you will be able to avoid that pain and loss. 

  1. Don’t know how

Sometimes, it can be difficult to move on as you just simply don’t know how. We all have different coping mechanisms, so speaking with a professional can help you to overcome that pain. 

  1. Letting go of unrealised dreams

One of the hardest things I found when moving on from my divorce was not saying goodbye to the relationship, but of letting go to all the unrealised dreams, hopes and expectations that I had envisioned for our future together. 

Need help to move on from a divorce?

Do you need help moving on from a divorce or unresolved grief? If you are feeling weighed down and at a loss, then I’m here to help you. As an Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist through The Grief Recovery Institute, I can help individuals just like you, so get in touch today.

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